Category Archives: Fire Down Below

November 20

30 Reasons I’m Thankful to Be a Gay Man

1.) Sex & The City. 2.) An innate sense of style. 3.) The interior decorator gene. There’s no excuse for shitty décor; walking into a home that looks like a 70’s thrift store or college dorm or Urban Outfitters is not “vintage,” it’s disturbing. 4.) My home state of Illinois becoming the 16th state to […]

October 12

Two Marriage Proposals & a Concussion, Part 3: Snap Out of it!

Back on the prowl, D and I were at Roscoe’s for that weekly routine of men really letting their hair hang down, “Drag Race.” We were there to support two of the “girls,” friends of ours. After the show, D and I split up to mingle for a bit. Sufficiently buzzed, I was off to […]

October 04

Two Marriage Proposals & a Concussion, Part 2: Am I on a Hidden Camera Show?

Attempting to shake off the “Fever” I had gotten a week prior, I decided to let D set me up with a friend. According to him, the guy was my perfect type; Hispanic, slim/athletic build, and spoke English. Always a necessity. I met him at a restaurant downtown. I walked in with high hopes, which […]

September 28

Two Marriage Proposals & a Concussion, Part 1: I Don’t

My best friend D and I had been spending almost every night together on Halsted in Boystown in Chicago. Regulars at Roscoe’s, we had even been given nicknames. Because of our poise, style and harsh judgment of others, D was dubbed, “P.B.” (Pretentious Bitch) and I, “B.B.” (Bitter Bitch); names we contentedly accepted. Could you […]

September 20

When Omission Becomes Detrimental

After my break-up with Cliff and surviving my Rabid Rebound I was enjoying singledom and hanging out with my best friend, D. Back on our weekly bar crawl, we began to see recurring faces. Two of them became regulars; Colton and Martin seemed to be on the same bar schedule as us. They were friends […]

September 13

The Hell You Endure For a Free Meal

“So… I knew he wasn’t the one when all he kept doing was talking badly about himself,” my sister Robyn said. “Out of nowhere he started telling me things like, ‘I have uncontrollable gas;’ ‘You should see my hair when it grows out. I’m almost completely bald;’ ‘I have a tiny penis.’” “I wanted so […]

September 06

Is it Possible to Get Crabs on Your Eyelashes?

On a rather mundane week night in, I was sorting laundry and checking the pockets when I came across the business card of the fella who had been the only positive highlight of my past week. As I held the card and my phone, I considered the fact that I had just narrowly survived the […]

August 31

Dating Dos and Don’ts

The search for Mr. Right – or in some cases – Mr. Right Now preoccupies much of our social lives. Despite the tools at the ready – including a number of apps and websites – while out at gay events or locales, I’ve found have become designed to facilitate meeting a mate. While there is […]

August 23

Two Strikes, You’re Out

It had been a few weeks and things were going well with Cliff and I. It was a new beginning. He was everything I remembered; open-hearted, sweet, funny and he even embraced my love of Sex and the City. Too good to be true, right? One day while at work, I received a distraught call […]

August 16

Screwing to the Beat of His Own Drum

A month or so had passed since my “office booty” and I was adjusting to my new found success; a great new job, a group of close friends and an apartment of my own. It was the eve of my birthday and I was spending it with my married, older sister, Lisa. Even though it […]